Thursday, April 24, 2008

Chinese Garden

Feelin' Zen

Chinese Garden at the MO Botanical Gardens -- My Favorite Garden

After a long cold Missouri winter and 1 1/2 years on a personal journey to reconnect to my inner wholeness / my "inner woman", I am still in search of that "placeless place" inside myself. That "place" that one can go, even in times of great stress and trauma. I believe we are all trying to find our inner "safe castles". What does it take to make us completely happy? We know that we cannot rely on external circumstance, events, people or things to make us happy because all of those things are in constant change. So true inner happiness must come from within, right? So how do we get there and stay "zen" consistently?

Well, I guess this is a lifetime struggle for some of us, if not all of us. And I find that nature and art -- its imagery -- helps me to feel close to "zen". I believe that when I someday arrive at this "placeless place" -- or even while I journey towards it, I will be able to create art which will truly heal myself and others.

Great books and guides are helping me on this personal journey as well. I am presently reading Dr. Barbara De Angelis' books. My favorite is "How Did I Get Here?" It is about finding one's way without "a map" to rebirth, renewed happiness and hope when life takes us on a different course, rather than what we envisioned. Dr. De Angelis believes that we can all connect to our inner happiness when we need to do so. I am also enjoying books by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer. His works explore restoring balance to one's life, spiritual solutions to our problems, as well as the study of the Tao.

As I journey to my "placeless place", I imagine a place of unbelievable, natural beauty -- a feeling of complete peace -- a direct connection to God.

MO Botanical Gardens -- Tulips in bloom along my visiting path. I notice that weather / nature really has an impact on my artistic mood and my overall mood in general. I especially love the ocean, and the water's ionizing relief that it brings to me.